First Review of New Dr. Zoltan "Emily Dickinson EP"

Review by Vlern

14 MINUTES OF AWESOME. 

If you’re one of those prog punk geeks like myself, or maybe just an internet geek in general, you may already have heard of Dr. Zoltan Øbelisk: formerly known as Sir Millard Mulch, creator of the life-changing triple-CD and companion book, “How To Sell The Whole F#@!ing Universe To Everybody, Once And For All!” Now functioning as Dr Zoltan, he has created a few interesting experiments in public opinion on YouTube, posting such rants as “Tool Are Not Weird Or Dark” and “Rage Against The Machine ARE The Machine” and the “No Fun Zone” — creating a backlash of responses from neanderthal music fans that can’t seem to spell very well. Entertaining stuff — but of course I have been patiently awaiting his next odyssey of music. Following ’How To Sell…’ would be no easy task.

His latest contest is a proposal to review his new EP in exchange for a copy of it, and I was one of the winners. So this morning I was happy to open my electronic mail and find a file of the Dr. Zoltan Øbelisk “Emily Dickinson Kindly Stops For Selective Serotonin Re-Uptake Inhibitors EP.” 

“WOW,” “Amazing,” and “What the Hell?” are usually the first things that come to mind when I hear his music. And this brilliant slice of ear candy is no different.

Endorsed by the makers of the DrumKit From Hell, Zoltan really knows what he is doing with that machine, and helps it live up to its name.

The very beginning of “Gnomon – He Who Discerns And Reveals, Movement DCCLXXVII” starts off majestic and odd, like entering through the giant stone doors of some futuristic kingdom… minimal at first, then you are ushered into the ballroom for a massive complicated costumed group dance that you missed all the lessons to. Zoltan plunges into tasty and speedy polyrythmic double bass blasts and Zappa-on-meth guitar, bass, and keyboard riffs all over the place and all over each other. “The Old World Monkeys and Their Masters” seems like a pain free dental checkup where you get a nice piece of candy at the end — since your teeth are in good shape, all smooth and shiny, sending you home to get some cavities. The Ep works as one piece of music, it’s over before you know it, and hey… what just happened? It must be played again.

The final, and my favorite track, “Escape From Beneath The Imaginary City” would be the the perfect soundtrack for that top secret “Project Bluebeam.” You know the one, where The Mililtary projects Giant Holographs of your chosen dieties floating in the sky all over the world, singing into your brain through electromagnetic radio waves. Yes, that would be perfect. This is classical music for the prog punks who have heard it all, and a workout for the guitar nerd… and it isn’t just riffage. The Dr. is a fine composer (I smell SOUL beneath all this blazing fingerwork). 

Really looking forward to the next album. 

(On an interesting side note, I met Zoltan through Larry, when Ralph and Larry from Victims Family and I were in Saturn’s Flea Collar. After SFC disbanded, Zoltan, still Mulch at the time, also recorded an excellent album with Ralph and Larry, called “Midvale School For the Gifted.” If You can find it, I recommend any music this human produces.

-VLERN

Dr. Zoltan’s comments: There are only a few details that should be mentioned here: much of the guitar shredding solos (other than on “Albums To Slay…”) were performed by Jake Willson, a young guitarist from the UK. And the drums (electronic “ddrums,” actually) were all played by Pat McDonald, who is now with Charlie Daniels Band. The next album, “Why I Am So Wise, Why I Am So Clever, And Why I Write Such Good Songs…” WILL feature Drumkit From Hell.

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